Years ago, I was in a church ripped apart by conflict. I remember sitting in several town hall meetings where friend turned against friend in highly emotional discussions. At each meeting that followed, I felt like I was sitting in an arena watching bulldozers going at each other and tearing down anything they could get to. People were deeply wounded, and the anger and bitterness split our church. It took years for it to recover. To be honest, there are still wounds that haven’t healed from those days.
Conflict is difficult, but it’s part of life. The question isn’t, will I face conflict, but how will I handle it when it comes? Will I be a peacemaker or a bulldozer? Will I build unity or tear it down?
If you’re in the middle of conflict,
- Ask the Lord to search your heart. Is there an issue in your life you need to deal with first?
- Seek resolution. Sit down and talk with the person, maybe bringing in a third party who can mediate. Even then, you may have to agree to disagree. If so, let it go and move forward. Don’t let it fester.
- Trust in the sovereignty of God. As bad as things may seem, God is still in control, and Romans 8:28 is still true: “God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”
Don’t let conflict tear down the body of Christ. As you find yourself in the midst of conflict, will you be a peacemaker, or a bulldozer?
Something I see that can be a huge problem is people saying negative things about someone in the church . I think it’s so important Never to believe anything unless you have heard both sides of a story . But better yet it’s important not to criticize people .
That is excellent advice, Roz. Criticism of others tears down unity. And you’re so right, there’s always two sides to a story. Thanks for your comments!